6 Simple Dutch Habits for Happiness, Health and Self Care
Transcript…
Hi everyone and welcome back. Today, I’ll be sharing six simple Dutch habits for happiness, health and selfcare. I love to be able to share a bit more of my culture with you today, and talk about some things that are quite normal for us Dutcvies, but might not be so normal everywhere. These habits can be done anywhere and don’t require anything special necessarily.
So my hope is that by the end of this video, you will have some new inspiration for habits that you could try to create more balance and health and happiness in your own life too, the Dutch way. The Netherlands are always ranked near the top of the happiest countries in the world. Last year we came in fifth.
And this is due to things like good work life balance, health care system, multicultural society, public transportation and a strong social safety net. Of course the Netherlands are not perfect either. But for today’s video, I wanted to focus more on the habits of individual people. Things that one person can do on their own to increase their happiness and wellbeing.
And even when it comes to the healthy habits, we Dutchies are not perfect. For example we love anything fried. Bitterballen, oliebollen and fries with lots and lots of mayo. But there are certain habits that are very much like ingrained in our culture that I really love. And that have to do with how we take care of ourselves. So let’s talk about it. Let’s start with the first thing, which is niksen.
One of my favorite words in the Dutch language. Niks is the Dutch word for nothing. So niksen, with the -en at the end, makes that into verb. So nisken means nothing-ing, or the art of purposefully doing nothing. And we love to niksen every once in a while, especially on the weekends.
Dutch people tend to have very busy schedules, filled with work, social activities, hobbies, sports, getting the kids to where they need to go, cleaning, grocery shopping. So niksen is a way for us to unwind, let go of any to-dos for a while. And we just do nothing productive, without any kind of guilt or shame around it. It can be just lounging around the house, not really doing anything special. Maybe read a book or a magazine.
Listen to some music. Watch a show you love for the 10th time. Take a nice long shower or a bath. When the weather is nice, we love to kind of just lounge around on the balcony or a backyard if we have one. It is really not so much about actually doing nothing per se.
Like it’s not sitting on a couch literally not doing anything. But it’s more about not doing anything productive, or with a purpose, or in order to achieve something. And you don’t have to look cute. So I know when it comes to self-care days on social media, it’s often like very aesthetic.
But with niksen you can just wear your pajamas or lounge wear. No makeup, hair all over the place. That’s fine. We even have a saying where we say ‘lekker stinken in huis’, which means like being nice and smelly in your own home.
Not necessarily something I recommend, but it is perfectly allowed if you’re having a niksen day. It’s also different from things like meditation or mindfulness for example. Both great habits and they also focus on like being in the moment and not doing anything. But with niksen, it is okay to let your mind wander.
You don’t have to focus on your thoughts, or your breath, or like being present and aware in the moment. You can just let time go by, simply just existing. Niksen is a way for us to carve out some time where nothing is required of us. I think that is the essence of niksen. Just have a little time where there’s nothing that you have to do, no balls to keep up in the air, no responsibilities.
Kind of like a little break from life, or the responsibilities of life. And for me, niksen is how I recharge my battery and how I am able to do life. And it’s very normal for us when you go back to work on Monday, and a coworker asks you like what you do on the weekend, someone might say: oh you know, on Sunday, nothing much, just a bit of cleaning, a bit of niksen, just nice.
And the colleague will probably say like oh okay, nice. If this sounds like something you want to try, I invite you to grab your calendar and plan a day, or a morning or an afternoon, of niksen time right now. Just schedule it in and enjoy it. It’s really nice. Number two is language learning.
So I think it is pretty well known that Dutch people, aside from speaking Dutch, most of us can also speak English. And I read that over 90% of us can hold a conversation in English, over 70% in German, almost 30% in French and 5% in Spanish. I think this is mostly because the Netherlands is a small country. Not a lot of people speak Dutch. But many people pass through our country.
So we learn languages like English, German, French in school, so that we can communicate with our neighbors. And we also like to visit the surrounding countries for a holiday. And Dutch people like to be able to have a conversation with the locals in their own language. And we also don’t dub our television shows and movies here. So many of us actually grow up hearing a lot of English from TV.
And language learning also has really great cognitive benefits. So it is a very healthy thing to do. I am also always learning languages. So of course my business is in English. I can also speak conversational Japanese and I’m now also learning Spanish.
Aside from being really fun, language learning can help with improving memory and problem solving skills, focus, concentration. It is just a great way to keep your mind agile. And you get bragging rights if you can understand a foreign movie without subtitles. It can also help to keep your brain healthy in old age. And every time you try to think of a word in another language, that’s cognitive training. And it’s really good for you.
There are many ways to learn a language and they’re all fun. In the end though, I do think that if you really want to be able to speak a language with confidence, it really helps if you can actually practice it with someone.
I know when I was in Japan for 2 weeks, I learned more Japanese there than in the months of practicing by myself before that. So that’s why I’m now also doing Japanese lessons on liveXP. This is a platform where you can find language tutors for private one-on-one lessons. And I’m very happy to say that they are also sponsoring this part of today’s video.
With liveXP, you can improve your conversation skills and pronunciation by speaking with tutors who are native speakers. They have over 2,000 tutors and over 30 languages on the platform, including English, Spanish, Chinese and for me, Japanese. I am having weekly lessons with Akiko-san, and it’s so much fun.
We get to talk about all kinds of interests, like Studio Ghibli or Japanese green tea. And she will teach me the right words and grammar and pronunciation along the way. How it works is you can choose a tutor based on the language that you want to learn and the language that you can already speak. You can even filter by interest, so you can always have things to talk about.
And then you can watch their introduction video, and book a 30 minute trial lesson. If you enjoyed it, then you can choose a subscription. It’s also really flexible. You can always switch between tutors and languages. You can change or cancel your subscription anytime.
Maybe you’re a complete beginner and you want to learn a few words for an upcoming trip. Maybe you’re like me and you want to kind of brush up on it and become better at it. So I asked Akiko-san to always correct me if I’m making a mistake. So in my last lesson with her, I said ‘ii da to omoimasu’, which I often say.
And she let me know that in this case it would be better to say ‘ii to omoimasu’. So that’s just a really nice way to learn a language. Live XP gave me a really great offer to share with you. So if you use my code HAPPYZEN, then you can get a 30 minute trial lesson for only 99 cents. And then if you like it, you can even get 30% of your subscription by using my code HAPPYZEN30.
So all the information is in the description box. And a really big thanks to live XP for sponsoring the video. Now let’s talk about another one of my favorite Dutch Words, which is gezellig. In fact, how could I make this more gezellig? Oh I know… there. Gezellig is one of the first words that you will learn when you come here. Which I know is mean, because no one can pronounce gezellig.
But you know, it is what it is. And it is so important for every Dutch person. It is part of our DNA. And it is so ingrained in our culture that it impacts almost everything that we do in some way. Except for going to the dentist. That’s never gezellig. Gezellig is hard to translate.
It is similar to the more well-known Danish word hygge, but there are also differences. It means consciously cozy. Taking something ordinary and making it more special. Or the pursuit of everyday happiness. The word derives from the word ‘gezel’, which means companion or friend. So it’s also like camaraderie. It is an abstract feeling that basically involves two things.
Making something special and cozy and nice. And connecting with another person. So let’s say you ask a coworker if they want to grab a cup of coffee. Depending on where you live in the world, you might picture grabbing a cup of coffee to go and then drinking that quickly, walking back or something like that.
But that is not how to Dutch do it. Because that’s not gezellig. So instead what we do is, we take some time. We find a nice place to sit. We chat, we enjoy our coffee and we take an actual break. So gezellig is about savoring pleasures and not rushing through them. Which is why all our cafes and restaurants look so nice and cozy.
Because if they didn’t look like that, no one was going to sit down there there and they won’t have any customers. We have a saying here that goes: gezelligheid kent geen tijd. Which means gezellig knows no time. So if we had to rush, then someone might comment like oh, that’s not gezellig. And it is an atmosphere where you’re able to relax in the moment. Some examples are eating dinner together with your family.
We like to do that if we can. Or meeting a friend at a bar and just ordering drinks and snacks and chatting and laughing, and before you know it, the whole night just flew by. Or spending hours talking with your friends on a terrasje, which is outdoor seating that we have here. And always, always, always serving a little cookie with your coffee.
So how can you create more gezelligheid in your own life? When you’re with a friend, don’t take your drink to go. Actually sit down, chat, laugh, get lost in conversation and forget about the time for a little bit. Small things make a difference. Light a candle. Use your most beautiful cups. Mood lighting.
Soft blankets, plants or flowers, picture frames. Always serve something lequer with your tea or coffee. Maybe a little cookie, or a small piece of chocolate, or a single strawberry. Eat with each other where there are no screens allowed. And turn the ordinary into something special. Seek out connection, find happiness in the little pleasures of life, and sprinkle some magic on the everyday normal things. Next one is about going outside. Dutch people tend to really like the outdoors.
And even with the weather being like rainy and windy and cold for large parts of the year, we do like to try and go outside when we can. Especially when the first sunny days of spring finally arrive. Dutch people really like to go out when the sun is finally there.
So after having a exceptionally depressing fall and winter season this year, the first sunny days, if you go outside, you will see Dutch people sitting on benches going like this… Just kind of soaking up the rays. So we tend to be opportunistic when it comes to the weather, because it can change every 5 seconds. So if you have your lunch break and it happens to be sunny, I think most people will probably go outside for a walk for their lunch break, instead of spending it inside in the cafeteria, or at their desk.
We even have an app called buienradar, which will let us know exactly if there’s going to be rain for the next 3 hours or so. And how we can just kind of go out when it’s not raining. One tradition that we have here, especially in the spring and summer, is going with friends to terrasjes, which is outdoor seating at cafes and restaurants. And you will see them everywhere.
And we don’t go for 30 minutes. We will spend hours there. Just continuing to order drinks and snacks and have conversations and laugh and enjoy the weather. Another thing that we love that has to do with the weather is uitwaaien. Which is going to the beach or somewhere on a windy day and just letting the wind kind of get in your head and blow away the cobwebs.
Even if it’s raining sometimes, we’ll just go we’ll just wear a jacket. We tend to say it refreshes and recalibrates you. It shakes you up a little and it gets you out of your thoughts and your worries. I’m very sensitive to strong wind. And the sound especially of strong wind.
So I still like to go uitwaaien, but what I will do is I’ll put a scarf or something to cover my ears. And there’s nothing quite like it. When you just have like a really long walk on the beach, and it’s windy and there’s the North Sea. And then afterwards you just feel like super tired, but also very relaxed.
And of course, ice skating. So almost everyone here knows how to ride a bike, swim, skate. It’s been a long time since we were able to go skating on like natural ice. But I remember when I was a kid we always would go and we would spend the whole day skating and drinking hot chocolate and eating erwtensoep.
Next habit is about efficiency. So Dutch people tend to really like working smarter, and not working harder. And so part of that is about our work efficiency. We don’t necessarily value working a lot of hours. We want things done as effectively and efficiently as possible, so that we can have that work life balance, and spend our time on things other than work.
In fact, doing research for this video I actually learned that we have the shortest work week in Europe. If you work in an office here, most likely around like 4:00, 4:30 p.m., everyone will still be working hard at their desks. And then once it’s 5:00 p.m.
maybe 5:30, people will get up shut off their laptop and leave. And you know by 5:30, almost no one will be left in the office. And we like to call that returning to our real life. One of the ways that we try to be more efficient is in the way that we communicate. And we have a very direct way of communicating, which outside of the Netherlands is known as Dutch directness or Dutch rudeness.
And I don’t necessarily think it is about being rude, although we we do have rude people here, definitely. But it is more so about not wasting time. Being straight to the point. Saying exactly what you think and being very direct. But I know this can be quite shocking for people who are coming here from other cultures, who are not used to this direct way of communicating.
And I also don’t even really like this myself sometimes. For example if you get a haircut, someone would just tell you they don’t like it. And I don’t think that we need to do that necessarily. But not all Dutch people are like that certainly. It’s more about clearly saying what you want, what you think. There’s no subtext and no hinting around.
If you find it difficult to voice your opinion clearly, or to speak up at a meeting, or to set boundaries with someone, then it could be good to practice you know bringing out your inner Dutchy and just being direct and communicating exactly what you think. The next one is about our hobbies. Because we value efficiency and work life balance, we have more time available for hobbies.
And Dutch people tend to have a lot of hobbies and interests outside of work. Which I never really like realized or noticed before, until I heard people like expats coming here from the United States, mention this on YouTube. For example, ‘what do you do for work’ isn’t really one of the first questions that we will ask ask someone when we meet them for the first time.
It might be in the first like five or 10 questions, but it will not be the first or the second question that we ask. We are more interested in what you like to do outside of work. A study done in 2023 among more than 12,000 participants showed the most popular hobbies and activities in the Netherlands. Reading, cooking and baking and traveling were the most popular.
Followed by pets, socializing, outdoor activities, sport and fitness, and video games. Other things mentioned were gardening, DIYing and meditation. There are several health benefits to engaging in an activity that you enjoy, just because you enjoy it. So it can help with mental health and overall well-being. It can lower the chance of depression. It can lower stress. It can lower our blood pressure.
So if you want to get in touch with your inner Dutchie a little bit more, maybe find something that you really like doing and find ways to do that a little bit more. And it doesn’t have to be all or nothing. You don’t have to have hours available for this new hobby. Like reading can be done in stretches of like 10 or 15 minutes.
Or let’s say you’re starting an herb garden on your balcony. That doesn’t require you to like do things every day for long stretches of time. So you could find little ways to do things that you enjoy, just because you like doing them. And that’s it.
I know we have some weird customs too, like how we celebrate birthdays, all just sitting in a circle, giving everyone three kisses, and being very stingy with our money. But my hope is that you also had some inspiration for things that you might like to try yourself. Definitely let me know, where you aware of any of these? Are they new for you, or maybe you have something similar in your own culture? Please let me know in the comments section.
And which of these is your favorite? For example, I did see niksen floating around online. Which was very fun for me, because it’s such a normal thing for us. I wasn’t really realizing that this is something that people are talking about online. Also don’t forget to check out liveXP and book your 30 minute trial lesson for only 99 cents. Links and the information in the description box below.
And as always: questions, comments, conversations down below. Have a wonderful, wonderful day. And I will see you all again next week. Bye bye. Okay so I went ahead and I bought a scrub mommy. So I couldn’t find a scrub daddy, but they did have have scrub mommies. And yes, I have to admit, this sponge is a lifechanger. It is so much better. I never want to go without it anymore.
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